I love my job.
For many different reasons. One of which, is if, at any certain time of the day, you stand still and just listen... you will hear at least 3 things that are funny.
SOMEtimes my job is stressful. but ALL times, it is funny.
The only drawback to my job, is when a child that you absolutely LOVE...leaves.
I remember one time, my cousin asked me if we teachers have favorites. And my reply was..Absolutely.
It doesn't mean that we care less for the other children, or that the quality of care that they receive is any less...it just means, that every once in a while, a child who is so unique...so Different comes along...that we LOVE.
MY first heartbreak occurred in 2008. I will never forget the little boy that stole my heart. He wore the most awesome VANS shoes and had the cutest feet in the world. I LOVED him. When he left,
I wrote my number on his daily communications sheet and his mom scoffed at my sadness "Sheesh Beanie!"
I remember she ran out to the car to get some paperwork and I lifted him up to my desk. "I love you Ryan."
"I know!" He giggled "I love you TOO BEANIE!" and he threw himself against me...his arms squeezed around my neck.
I gulped back my tears. I couldnt believe I was so sad.
"Just remember that I love you, and I will think of you all of the time."
"...Kay..." He laughed and I set him back on the floor.
His mom came, she rolled her eyes at my tears and he walked away....His shark shoes skipping...and hopping...away. He was two.
I saw him again when he was 4. He was in my class for a few weeks....but he left again soon.
I saw him again a month or so ago. He stood there with his dad, his hair silky and justin bieber-ish.
"Ryan?"
He smiled at me
"Do you remember me?"
He nodded shyly
His dad said "of course he remembers you."
"Ohmygosh..can I have a hug?"
He shyly came forward and hugged me softly. I didn't know what else to say, so I made a comment on his still adorable vans shoes.
He smiled, they picked up his cousin and he left.
My heart went unscathed for awhile, until I met Byron.
I loved him so much. I love him STILL and its been almost a year since I have seen him.
He was so funny. So smart. He loved Halloween and I taught him how to draw Zombies with brains leaking out of their heads.
He would, at times get so frusterated, because people interrupted him, or someone didn't understand him, and he would cry and run across the room.
I would always follow and hug him and calm him.
He would sit next to me, and we would color all sorts of scenes. One of my favorites was a circus scene....complete with balloons and a ferris wheel.
Every day he would make me laugh, and when he was going to leave, he knew it.
I remember him coming up to me and telling me that he remembers his last life, and he asked me to wait for him in heaven when I die....so that we could come back to earth together.
But he made me double pinky promise that I would remember to be funny and wierd.
Which I did.
When he left, it was the worst. To THIS day....The worst.
I made him a card and I couldn't even read it to him. I was crying so much. My co-teachers laughed and "aweee'd" at me.
They hugged me and tried to make me laugh...But they couldn't.
ALL year at certain times in our curriculumn, I would ask my co-teacher "Remember last year when Byron said ......."
She would laugh and "Aweee"
Today I woke up and the first word I uttered was "Shit."
It's one of my kids last days. My favorite dinosaur meal.
Today i will cry, I just know it.
Yesterday he sat down in front of me, criss cross applesauce, and listened to me read Yurtle the Turtle. (one of my favs) He stared at me and finally said "Beanie...Its my last day tomorrow."
RIGHT in the middle of Yurtle stomping up another turtles back...
(And if you are 4 years old, and in my class, you KNOW that you NEVER interrupt Beanie when she is reading a story.)
I put the book down and stared at him. "I know. I'm ignoring it."
I picked the book up and tried to concentrate on what a bastard Yurtle was.
....But I couldn't.
I looked at him and sighed.
He smiled at me sadly.
"What am I supposed to do without you?"
He shrugged his shoulders "You know beanie."
"What do I know?"
"You just know!"
"Who will the dinosaurs eat if it isnt you?"
He shook his head and looked down. "Maybe....Noah."
"No...too bony."
I sighed and put the book down.
I stood up and left the room to another teacher.
I don't know if parents realize how much their children impact our lives. They make us laugh, and they embed themselves into our hearts.
