My favorite thing about men, and the reason that I gravitate twords a friendship with them, is the honesty that comes out of it. You can ask them anything and they answer it candidly.
I love my friendships with women as well, but when you are friends with a man, it is a different sort of honesty. Sometimes it is jarring, and rude. But it is almost always truth. And there is nothing that I appreciate more, in ANY relationship, then truth.
While having lunch with a friend last week, I was making fun of him and in turn he was making fun of me. That is just the way our friendship is. It makes me happy, but I'm not sure why.
I was making fun of the fact that he is a neat freak and would probably need gloves and a towel for sex. And he responded with..
"I would never lay ANYWHERE around you, or near you." He said with utter disgust on his face.
And I was immediately filled with questions.
Why?
Am I not beautiful enough?
Am I not intelligent enough?
Am I too fat?
Am I too short?
Does my laugh grate on your nerves?
Is it my Bells Palsey? Maybe that is gross to you.
What is so unattractive about me to you?
I had to bite my lips to keep from asking him these questions.
I did not ask him those questions because :
A) I couldn't figure out, at that time, how to ask them without him thinking that he had hurt my feelings or him backtracking entirely. And I didn't want him too. I also did not want him to say anything good about me, because as sick as it is. We just don't "roll" like that.
B) We were interrupted
C) The venue that we were lunching at was too public. Plus my lunch time was too short.
D) If he took it back, he would immediately take away the blog that was already stewing in my brain.
Now. Let me explain my brain.
I can latch onto a subject that interests me quite quickly and my brain will not be able to let it go until the questions that I need to have answered ARE.
And it became a quest. About men, and what they find attractive in a woman.
I asked Men, Lesbians and Transsexuals.
I asked older men, younger men and in-between men.
I asked single men and married men.
I asked Happily married men and Fake happily married men.
I asked religious men and non religious men.Their answers are below. You can match them by numbers or colors. M1, M2 ect...
What makes a woman beautiful?
M1) It is attractive that a woman is showing her beauty through her actions. It is not an age thing. I personally have a distaste for selfish people in general. If I see a woman of any age, from my daughter to my grandmother in law showing kindness or doing acts if kindness, especially if no one is looking.
M2) Aside from a nice body, I would say how they look. Looks as in, do they seem like they're happy with life or themselves. Do they smile, would it be someone I could talk to on a daily basis. I also like a woman who's more natural that wears very little makeup.
M3) Natural Beauty not needing a lot of makeup.... Another thing I find attractive is self confidence. Physical beauty may be one thing but emotional and mental beauty is on another level with me. How one feels about themselves is very important. Mental competence and awareness, always able to find something positive or beautiful. Beauty doesn't have to be seen, it is more important to be felt and shared. That is attractive to me.
M4) Smile, sense of humor and confidence. Initially tits....over time smile... Physically I don't really have limitations.
M5) her personality makes her beautiful. I am physically attracted to green eyes and pretty smiles.
M6) Boobs and Butt initially. Someone who is classy. Intelligence is very important. If you are intelligent then you are never boring. My wife is attractive to me because of the way that she shows caring with others. How she is always positive about everything.
M7) A pretty face
A woman who takes care of herself
Happy
Independent
And of course a lamb in the streets but a tiger in the sheets!
M8) I prefer pretty women over "Hot" women....also, you should know that alcohol can make anyone attractive.
M9) Being sexy. Their eyes. You can see a lot about someone in their eyes. Their hair...the way they talk.
M10) A nice smile, willingness to use said smile, intelligence, being nice, friendliness, a good sense of style, and a nice butt.
M11) A nice vagina is attractive.
M12) Intelligence is number one. A positive attitude. Nice boobs. Really nice boobs. And someone who isn't boring.
M13) A woman with a body like a woman. Not too skinny. intelligence. That is important.
M14) Have you ever heard someone laugh, and then YOU laugh, simply because they are?
I can think that someone is bleh and then she laughs and that laughter becomes infectious to me. If you laugh at my jokes you are sexy to me. If you laugh at my penis I do not.
I think that attitude is the most important part of being sexy. I think that a woman who believes that she IS beautiful....is. It is in her confidence.
A woman can have a plain face, but a beautiful soul. And that soul glows from within. That soul will outlast the most expensive makeup and the most skilled plastic surgeon. I guess to me the most beautiful woman is the one who is the most real. Who laughs the loudest. Who loves every moment... even the bad ones.
M15) A smile makes a woman beautiful. Boobs is a first attraction or what I at first.
M16) Are you going to be mad at me if I say "Id hit that?" I mean I'm nervous. You make me nervous. If I say something wrong then are you going to blog about it?
"Probably"
Stop laughing. Don't laugh. I'm not answering this.
What makes a woman Unattractive?
M1) A woman can have gracefulness, and refinement and be unattractive because of the motives behind the actions. Someone who is physically attractive can open their mouth and their attitude and motives and selfishness shows, and "blehg" they aren't attractive anymore.
M2) Just say NO to cake faces! I mean how ugly are they to be covering up so much? Plus all that cooked tan skin and heavy makeup scream HIGH MAINTENANCE! Also, teeth are extremely important to me! If a woman isn't smiling I worry, because I think there may be horrible teeth she's hiding.
I like to know if a woman can be attractive OUT of makeup.
Plus all that tanning will be disgusting years from now!
Plus nobody likes a Debbie D. Depression Downer of Killjoy Village
M3) Being able to only see or share the negative and ugliness is a turn off.
M4) Personality wise prissy princes high maintenance types. Afraid to get dirty ect
M5) ignorance or playing "dumb" turns me off.
M6) I guess the opposite of what I was saying earlier. Someone who does not take care of themselves. You know...who does not even TRY to do something with themselves every morning. Someone who is NOT classy and who is unintelligent. Intelligence is very important.
Also....the kind of woman who is ALWAYS negative about EVERYTHING. No matter what you do, it is never enough. OR whatever YOU do she has done it better. Oh yeah...unattractive.
M7) clumsiness is unattractive.
Smoking
Being loud and obnoxious (like ghetto girls)
Farting/burping
Bathroom stuff not being private
Getting drunk (not tipsy, but sloppy falling down, slurring, drunk).
M8) Anytime a woman utters the words "I can be a bitch" Yeah...that is unattractive to me.
M9) Smoking. You can be the MOST beautiful creature in the world. But I don't like smoking.
M10) Being mean, lack of intelligence, strongly held and poorly defended religious beliefs, lack of ability to self reflect, lack of thirst for knowledge
M11) Pshyco-ness is very unattractive.
M12) I guess the opposite of what I said. Stupidity..or someone who dumbs herself down. No boobs. And grumpy. I can't stand grumpy.
M13) I don't like women who are too skinny. And someone who has a bad attitude.
M14) I base unattractiveness on a case by case basis. If you are a woman who is all of the time negative. You are unattractive. If you have gorgeous heels on and bitch all of the time about my comic book collection. You are unattractive and your shoes become ugly too.
If you want to fight just because...That is most certainly ugly.
M15) A big mouth as in loud is a turn off.
M16) .........
In conclusion These were interesting questions to be asked. I noticed that the men who were married or had been married or in a long term relationship, answered with more character based answers.
In most men religion did not matter, unless it was considered to be a long term "relationship" . All men like boobs and some men were frightened of me.
In the end, Negativity and unintelligence seemed the most unattractive, while the reverse seemed to be the MOST attractive. Coupled of course, with tits and ass.
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