#momguilt

The other day a parent at work and I argued over who was the worst mom in the world.

"I need to take a picture of this summer calendar. I haven't yet. It's because I am a bad mom." She shook her head and snapped a picture.

"No, No. I am a horrible mom. I don't even make my kids dinner every night."

"Psh. I got that one beat....One time.."

And it went on.

In reality, If motherhood was measured in the amount of laughter our house held. Then I would win mom of the year.

As it is, my sink always has dishes, my living room always needs to be vacuumed and FORGET about my yard.

(Literally...don't even drive by.)

If you do, you will see a couch that is still sitting there from when I got my new one. And I don't even blame MYSELF.... I blame the taste of my neighborhood tweakers.
(Like seriously? Don't they know how comfy that couch is? Why haven't they taken it?)

So it is sitting there like magic will one day make it disappear. Or my children, if they would only listen to me and garb themselves in black at midnight and walk it two doors down.

Also, as a back up plan. I have HUGE ideas for that couch at Halloween time. So. If it stays maybe I will try and pretend that I wanted it too.

Right now, as I type, my neighbors are outside raking their yard and sweeping their outside carpet. (I guess it's a thing.) while glancing over at my yard in disgust.

I have yard shame. 

Enough to feel sorta bad about it, but not enough to go outside and join them in early morning raking.

Don't they KNOW Jesus wants me to sit on my butt on Sunday?

I always have good intentions in the morning, when I am energetic and hopping down he steps to work. "Okay, tonight I will work on the yard for an hour." I say to my deflated rose bushes and dried up grape vine.
But as I slug my way in the gate, up the stairs and into my home I ignore my earlier intentions and focus on whats REALLY important. My butt on this couch.

I have noticed that almost everyone has mom guilt. It just comes in different forms.
Working too much mom guilt
Stay at home mom guilt.
Fat people mom guilt
shopping addict mom guilt
I have an asshole kid mom guilt

All KINDSA guilt.

It is a fact that I don't beat my children. I don't smoke the ganja nor do I sleep with men and sneak them out my window (anymore). We women are too hard on ourselves. This I know.
And even though I try as hard as I can, to ignore the mom guilt as flawlessly as I do that couch outside, i just cant kick it.

Because whenever I do, I feel too guilty.