The players....

I want to introduce to you all of the players in my world, so in future writing you will know exactly of whom I speak.

This is me:

My name is Laurie, but no one really calls me that. At a later date perhaps I will explain how I got the name Beanie, but that is what I go by.

I am 33 years old and the mother of two amazing children. Sometimes I am so amazed by my witty smart children that I want to start spitting kids out of my vagina like watermelon seeds, simply to populate the world with Pure Happiness.

I am single, but still stuck on my ex boyfriend who is basically a very tall ass. It doesn't matter what I do, I keep coming back to him. It sucks, but that is where that is.

I have tried to get interested in other men, but basically all men are douches.

I love rainbows, and happy earrings. I work at a child care facility and I absolutely love my job.

I drive a very lumpy car. Her name is Pearly. Right now Pearly is in my driveway sick, because...well...she cost 600 bucks and that's what happens.

This is Shane. A.K.A Foofy, The foofinator, Sonshine, or turdknuckle, (depending on my mood that day)



Shane is 15 years old, and I'm in love with him. He loves video games, Drama class and now foreign language class (He's taking Russian)

He makes me smile every day, and he has a wicked sense of humor. He is the best thing I ever did as a teenager.

This is Emma.She is 8. She loves to accessorize and she is practically a genius....(okay she is)
She is the best snuggler in the world and she loves every animal. She wants to grow up and rescue them....I told her to grow up .....and become a MODEL who rescues animals....she is still thinking about it.

I live with my ex-husband, which, is weird. But it is working, for now.
Chris was in a relationship for three years and uh.....now he's not. So i offered him our daughters pink room to shack up in until he can get on his feet.

This is my very own old man (be jealous!)
I love him. His name is Roger, but I call him Kent. This really is just a cartoon...I don't have any snapshots yet. Plus Kent is truly much happier.

He is amazing, and I hope I get to keep him forever.

My BFF is Dawn:She is very freckly, happy and tall. We have been Best Friends for like 5 years and I would DIE without her.
Dawn once hurled herself out of a window to save my daughters life. I wish i could say that she flew through the air and landed in a garbage truck with Emma curled safely in her arms, but it was just on the same level....Not as good of a story.

When she is annoyed at me, she shoves the scar on her hand in my face and kicks my shin.
(not really)

I call her my freckly Giraffe sometimes and she has the most amazing laugh....ever.

I wish that Dawn had a Penis, cuz then all of our boy problems would be solved and we'd just shack up, have 5 kids and grow old together.

As it is, we both love penises, and she loves Jesse...

I love him too. He takes care of me, because its in his job description. Everywhere we go its us three....

Sometimes Jesse and I fight over Dawns love and attention...
But then Dawn smacks us both until we love each other again.

So there ya go......The MAIN players. I will introduce others as I go along. I hope you enjoy my life. Its truly not very exciting, but for some reason people laugh at me when I speak. *shrug*